If the return back to school after the summer holidays fills you with dread and you are feeling anxious, overwhelmed and frustrated, I see you.Trying to support your child with anxiety is all consuming. I’m on a mission to help parents reconnect and give themselves the nourishment they need to be able to support their anxious child.

When our child is anxious the alarm center of the brain ( the amygdala) gets activated. Us parents go into our own fight and flight mode our own amygdalas get hijacked. Our hearts begin to race and we are unable to think clearly. We’ve all been there. It doesn’t have to be this way. Mindfulness is awareness and acceptance and when followed with self kindness we can respond to ourselves and our child with calm and clarity.

Mindfulness changed my life. I found a new way to nourish my own mental health and support my child. Please read on to find out more about the ways mindfulness can help you as you support your anxious child.

1. Mindfulness helps you speak kindly to yourself

As a parent of an anxious child the critical voice is very loud, telling you that you’re failing as a parent. You find yourself asking, “why can’t I manage this the way other parents do?” This is what I asked myself and no wonder as we live in a culture of perfection , we feel that we are falling short and then we criticise and turn on ourselves.

Mindfulness and Self-compassion practices are an antidote to this self critical voice. I have found in my own life that consistent practice of mindfulness and Self-compassion practices have allowed me to turn down the volume of the critical voice and hear things like

I am enough
I am doing the best I can
I’m still a good parent
I can be kind to myself in this moment

2. Mindfulness meditation helps you nourish yourself both physically and mentally

Trying to support your child with anxiety can leave you feeling overwhelmed, frustrated and exhausted. Mindfulness meditation is the gift you deserve for yourself. Guided mindfulness gives you the time out and the rest you need to enable you to respond to yourself and your child with calm and clarity. Being a part of a community of parents just like you can be very helpful when practicing. From my own experience this was the case, parents supporting each other through their common humanity. Meditation can change your brain and is backed by science. Research conducted by Sara Lazar showed that after just eight weeks of practicing grey matter increased in the areas of the brain associated with emotional regulation, empathy and compassion.

Here’s why you need to bring mindfulness into your life as there are so many benefits to help you support your anxious child:

3. Mindfulness helps you to identify what you need

A huge part of mindfulness is reflecting and inquiring on what it is that our heart, body and mind needs. Mindfulness allows us to reflect through guided practice, reflective questioning and journaling. When a parent of an anxious child identifies what they need through mindfulness practices they can then resource themselves appropriately. Filling up our own cups with self-care and nourishment regulates our own nervous systems. Feeling nourished and energized you know how best to respond to your child at the school drop off.

Examples of resourcing:

Setting a boundary
Connecting with a friend
Time out in nature
An early night
Less time on social media

I see you if you’re late night googling “What to do when your child has anxiety” and wake up feeling helpless. I too was waking up every morning feeling this way. That was before I discovered mindfulness. Wouldn’t you love it if you had the tools to respond to daily life with calm and clarity. Imagine if your child was telling you that they now know what they can do to help themselves when they feel anxious. That when they practice mindfulness they feel more calm and settled when anxiety comes to visit them. This happened for me.

Mindfulness is a toolbox for both you and your child when anxiety comes to visit and provides many ways to respond in the moment and to cope with it.

Examples of some tools:

Breath practices
Using the senses
Creative practices
Working with feelings as visitors

For example one of the ways you can use the senses is on the school run. You and your child can notice what you can see,hear, touch, taste and smell. Using the senses is a tool we can use to respond to anxiety , it allows us to get in touch with what is happening now without getting caught up in our future thoughts and worries.

In summary, you can use mindfulness to support you and your anxious child and bring joy into your life. Mindfulness is more than just meditation, it’s a practical tool for both you and your child to use when anxiety comes to visit and provides many ways to respond in the moment and to cope with it . It allows us to enquire, resource and talk to ourselves the way we would speak to a really good friend.

If you’d like to discover more about these tools and how to use them, sign up for my Mindfulness and Self-Compassion course.

Learn more

I’m Lynn a Mindfulness Coach.
I help parents feel calm, connected and confident. Moving them from being overwhelmed and stressed.
Enabling them to quieten down the
self-criticism and judgement replacing it with a kinder inner dialogue.
Supporting them to create a life that feels centered and grounded.
Guiding them to cultivate more energy, rest, resilience and confidence to handle parenting challenges.

Disclaimer: It is normal to feel anxious in certain situations in your life but if it is an ongoing problem that is affecting your mental health on a daily basis it is advisable to contact your GP or seek a therapist. Mindfulness is an intervention that can work well alongside additional support but it is not a replacement for therapy.

3 ways mindfulness can help as you support your anxious child